March 13, 2010

April Home Giveaways Preview

PITTSBURGH, Pa. / March 13, 2010

Before I start with the promotions, I am pleased to report that The Pittsburgh Kid Paul Spadafora defeated Ivan Fiorletta by technical knockout Friday improving his record to 44-0-1. 50,000 people will watch a couple of three loss fighters tomorrow in Dallas, while Spadafora can't get a title fight because everyone is afraid of him.

Monday, April 5 vs. Los Angeles - 1:35 p.m.
Opening Day / Magnetic Schedule
The home opener is the most fun Pirates game of the season, and this year we get a rare home game on the true Opening Day. While the schedule magnet is not that amazing, the atmosphere of being at a 100% full PNC Park is unbeatable. Last year we also got an unadvertised free hat so I would expect something similar again.

The Pirates have announced that standing room-only and single-seat tickets are all that remain. I have 30 tickets to the game so it must be awesome to be my friend.

Wednesday, April 7 vs. Los Angeles - 7:05 p.m.
There's no giveaway this night and it's likely to be cold. But for people who can't get out of work during the day this is the only chance to see them against a good team this month. To me the Dodgers organization always has had a certain cachet.

Thursday, April 8 vs. Los Angeles - 12:35 p.m.
T-Shirt Thursday

This is my favorite among the 2010 free shirts. It's a unique yet understated design with the PNC park diagram. You'll get to see either Cy Ohlendorf, Cy Duke or Cy Maholm pitching and you'll have a whole section to yourself. Luckily my schedule is open from 11:45-4:30 Thursdays, a perfect window to go claim this shirt.

Friday, April 16 vs. Cincinnati - 7:05 p.m.
Pirates Aluminum Water Bottle
These water bottles are all the rage these days. You can tell because the same people who own Mac laptops own them. Not only that, but aluminum is unparalleled amopng metals for its combination of strength and relatively light weight. Another game I'm planning to attend.

Saturday, April 17 vs. Cincinnati - 7:05 p.m.
Fireworks / Irish Celebration / Scratch'n Win Saturday
PIttsburgh loves fireworks. Why is it Scratch'n Win? Shouldn't it be Scratch 'n' Win? I guess they want parallelism with Eat'n Park, where you will most certainly "win" two dollars off. Cincinnati has a lot of fairly interesting young players. Hopefully in this game Pittsburgh is not called for a late hit out of bounds FOR HITTING A GUY WHO IS STILL IN BOUNDS.

Sunday, April 18 vs. Cincinnati - 1:35 p.m.
Kids Day / Kids Andy LaRoche Replica Home Jersey
I see people walking around with kids all the time. Where are they finding women who aren't on The Pill? Unfortunately I haven't figured out the answer to this question.

Oakland coeds, if you're planning ahead for Halloween, a child's size Andy Laroche jersey would be perfect, cut up, for your "SluRoche" costume.

Tuesday, April 20 vs. Milwaukee - 7:05 p.m.
Ah, a rare Pirates-Brewers series. The Bucs haven't had much success against Milwaukee the last few years, but the 2010 Brew Crew is going with a rotation of Yovani Gallardo, Randy Wolf, Doug Davis, Jeff Suppan and Manny Parra. That looks merely well below average until you consider the top three are locks to get hurt...

Wednesday, April 21 vs. Milwaukee - 7:05 p.m.
...The Brewers had the NL's third best offense in '09 but Mike Cameron and Jason Kendall are gone, replaced in the starting lineup by Carlos ".292 career OBP" Gomez and 39 year old Gregg "Only in the starting lineup ironically" Zaun. Felipe Lopez had a .407 OBP in his half season and is gone as well. Their bench is Jody Gerut, Joe Inglett, Craig Counsell, George Kottaras and Mat Gamel.

Thursday, April 22 vs. Milwaukee - 12:35 p.m.
Pirates Recycled Green Cap / T-Shirt Thursday / Alumni Autographs
The motherlode! I'll gladly buy a $9 ticket to see the game and get a free cap and T-shirt. The hat will be perfect for many St. Patrick's Days to come, and the shirt looks awesome in an "already looks like a 20 year old find at Goodwill" kind of way.


  1. New Castle Fan death night - Opening day. I'll kill that mother fucker.

  2. I'll be there! I'd love to hang out with some other commenters, let me know if you want to meet for a beer before the game.

  3. You moron, I'll kill you. Don't you dare show your face.

  4. Well Opening Day doesn't look good but I'll be coming down for a bunch of games this year, I'm sure we can meet up.

  5. Stadium shirt looks badass.